Airport Security Stories

Traveling for a while has given me the opportunity to accumulate a couple entertaining stories about my encounters with airport security when fumbling my way through the metal detector exercise.

1.  Pre-Trip Happy Umbrella Turned Sad

This first story takes place a couple years back.  I am at the Boston airport and the security line is empty.  At least it is empty of other passengers, and that brings the guard to passenger ratio up very high when I step up.  I’ve never seen a group of guards look so excited about an airline passenger.  I start the whole routine of taking off my shoes, taking out the liquids, removing my computer from its bag, emptying my pockets, and so on.  I walk through the metal detector with no problem as is to be expected considering my pants are falling down from no belt and all of my other possessions are currently being passed through the separate scanner.  My shoes come through first and a guard approaches them and asks to take a particle sample off the top.  My tennis shoes may have seemed more threatening than I had realized.  Then, my bag appears out of the scanner and it just sits there waiting for me as I am tying my shoe laces.  However, before I can finish with my shoes, someone asks if they can do a “random” check on my bag.  I say sure, and while going through the bag, he finds my bright yellow umbrella.  There are few things like a bright yellow umbrella with a handle that has a suspended smiley face to improve a rainy day.  He finds this innocuous yellow ball with a painted smile and two dots for eyes floating in the handle of my umbrella and he explains that I am not allowed to take this with me.  I am quick to respond that it is less than 3 oz, so there shouldn’t be a problem.  He then goes on to explain that this situation falls under the Snow Globe Category and because I am unable to access the inner space of the handle, it must be confiscated.  Frustrated that security is taking longer than if there had been a descent line of passengers, I show him that he can remove the handle without taking the entire umbrella.  He returns the umbrella, and I ask him if he finds it strange that he has just returned the more dangerous part of my umbrella.  There is a solid awkward silence before he apologizes for taking my handle, does not return it regardless, and we part ways.

2.  18ml too much of Sunscreen

During one of my many stops in the Bangkok International Airport, which looks more like a luxury shopping mall than an airport in some sections, I forget to put my 118ml tube of sunscreen in my check baggage.  It is good sunscreen and I try to reason with the guard that I probably cannot even remove 100ml of sunscreen out of this tube if I wanted to.  (100ml is the liquid limit for the rest of the world who deals in metric.)  I then convince her to let me run around the airport and try to find a container small enough so that I can transfer the sunscreen and carry it on.  After much debate, I am given 13 minutes to see what I can find.  I run around the airport and I return to the security checkpoint with my 100ml tube and ask to see my sunscreen.  I start the transfer and I quickly realize that the sunscreen gets caught in the neck of my new bottle and I have to frequently pound the bottle on the table to force the sunscreen to settle to the bottom.  The security guard is watching me closely and thinks that the bottleneck (pun intended) is that the sunscreen does not want to come out fast enough.  She asks if she can do the transfer, and I don’t feel like I have many options so I let her try.  She forces the sunscreen to the open end of the tube, she places this end of the tube inside the bottle and starts squeezing with significant force.  I take a step back.  Soon after, sunscreen literally explodes all over the bottle, the table, and her hands.  I gasp.  I figure if they are going to give me a hard time for 18 extra milliliters, I am allowed the “involuntary” reaction of gasping.  The gasp causes those nearby to look, which of course is the point, and the security guard starts to hand the sunscreen and the bottle back to me.  I look at the mess and sensibly ask if she has any napkins or paper towels.  Eventually, I do end up filling my 100ml bottle up at least three-quarters, and I am on my merry way.

3.  Scissors

To set the scene, we are leaving Paris, I have a red beret on, and as has become the rule for my passage through airport security, something gets a double check.  In this case, my backpack needs to be examined.  I put my beret back on now that they trust there is no metal in my felt red hat, and the security guard starts to dig in my bag.  Again, he finds sunscreen, which I say he can take.  However, he also finds scissors in a first aid kit I have been carrying around.  I explain that I am impressed with this find and that I have passed these scissors undetected through many an airport security.  He removes the scissors from the kit, does something with his key chain, and then returns the scissors back to their original pouch.  Amazed, I need to stop him and ask why I get to keep them.  He is confused as to why I am asking, and he initially pretends not to notice.  I ask again, and he explains that scissors are allowed to be of a certain length (I believe 6cm) on an airplane.  He then goes to throw away the sunscreen, and I again stop him and say that it’s pretty good sunscreen, and if he can, he should take it home.  He laughs, throws away the sunscreen, and we split never to see each other again.

4.  “You need to drink that or throw it away”

A plastic disposable water bottle is by definition disposable if one forgets to drink its contents before venturing through security.  However, a metal, green, sustainable, refillable water bottle is not as trash-ready.  I am in the Frankfurt Airport, and I get stopped after going through the metal detector because there is water in my bottle.  Germany, a country that strongly believes in rules, is not the place to mess with security.  That said, in a very friendly way, I take a solid couple gulps of water and then pause for a break.  I probably ask the guard a filler question at this point since he is watching me drink my water and it seems a bit awkward.  I repeat the gulp, pause, question routine about 3 or 4 times, after which the guard says that it’s fine and I can continue.  This is particularly good news because I will be sitting in a window seat on the next flight making the bathroom much farther away.

Traveling with Parents

There were a couple changes, in no particular order, that I experienced when traveling with my parents:

  • Bedtime moves to 10:30pm
  • Nicer meals
  • More map folding
  • Automatic shifting rental car
  • More talk about grandchildren
  • Nicer accommodations
  • Greater patience needed
  • Increased planning
  • Good meal conversation
  • Never missing breakfast

A Little Luccan Relaxation

A little shopping, a little eating, a little resting, a little writing, and a little reading, all followed by dinner at the apartment and a choral performance in the evening.  Now that we are on our last day in Lucca, we can confirm that the apartment where we spent the week worked very well.  We all felt comfortable with its two bedrooms, two bathrooms, living/dining room, enclosed patio, small yet functional kitchen, and washing machine.  And the wifi works great, so there was little to complain about.  We are located near Lucca’s famous wall, and would use said wall to walk to dinner or post-dinner performances.  Free parking wasn’t far away and although we were not allowed to park within the city’s walls, we wouldn’t have wanted to anyway.  Our “small” car was not small enough for some of the so-called two way roads in the old city.

From Lucca's wall

Usually around this point of a vacation, and by that I mean a time when one activity is coming to an end, my mom focuses on the highlights of the last activity.  This, of course, was before Charlotte.  In Italy especially, it is probably inappropriate to redefine BC as Before Charlotte, but luckily BCE, a more neutral term, can also apply when taking into account the baby’s whole name.  Ever since the family transition from BCE to CE, the mode of thinking, the topics of conversation, and the usage of online video chat have all undergone substantial changes.  And they are changes for the better!  Back to the topic of missing our week end’s debriefing, we are mostly focused on tomorrow’s plan to get to Rome, find the apartment, return the car, and meet up with the rest of the family.  There are some logistics to take care of; however, we are all excited to be entering phase two of Italian Family Vacation.

    Summer Festival – Lucca 2011

    Like Perugia and like Spoleto and like probably many other small towns throughout Italy, Lucca hosts a summer music festival complete with big name artists.  This summer, some of the names that Lucca is or has already hosted includes Elton John, Liza Minnelli, Arcade Fire, Ben Harper, and James Blunt.  Timing worked out that we are able to watch J. Blunt.  The concert was fun, the music singable, and the crowd energized, but equally impressive to all of that is the setting.  Located in the heart of the old town in Piazza Napoleone, this festival transforms a piazza in a town that used to be a Roman colony in 180 BC into a modern theater.  Blunt’s song “You’re Beautiful” should be directed at the town, at the piazza, and at the entire surreal setting.

    James Blunt in Lucca

    Tuscany Driving, Part II

    Our first destination today is Pisa, where I have the chance to revisit its famous leaning tower.  Soon after arriving, the sky opens up and it starts to pour.  We avoid some of the rain in shops and some more with a cafe dopio.  It does eventually begin to clear and the sun even shows itself.  The area around the tower, duomo and chuch is a zoo– the zoo’s animals beings tourists and the cages being ropes.  Although not long after my last visit just a couple weeks ago, being back in Pisa feels a little like walking around my college campus well after graduation.  I am there in a new context, with new people, with new goals, and places with attached memories seem changed.  I enjoy being back, but everything seems strangely familiar.  After all, I was only there for 24 hours the time before.  Pisa is our main stop of the day, but we still have more of Tuscany to see before returning to Lucca.

    The Arno in Pisa

    Our next stop is the Marina di Pisa, a small town on the water that is logically close to Pisa.  The town feels like it used to be a hotter vacation spot than it is today, and in fact, the town was mostly built in the late 1800’s and then more in the 1930’s.  That said, our quick visit is not the best judge of Marina di Pisa’s popularity because the wind is strong, the sky is still cloudy, and the temperature isn’t warm.  People may be hiding from the elements.  After Pisa, we do a drive through of Tirrenia and a gelato stop in San Giuliano Terme.  San Giuliano Terme, according to Frommer’s, is a reminder of the 18th and 19th century golden age, when its hot springs were renowned throughout Europe and drew some famous visitors.  Today’s drive features more windy mountain roads, more tunnels, and more bridges, picturesque enough to encourage me to try to snap a couple photos from behind the wheel.

    San Giuliano Terme

    Tuscany Driving, Part I

    Lucca is our home base for exploring Tuscany.  As a gift to my parents while traveling, I ordered Frommer’s “25 Great Drives in Tuscany and Umbria” from Amazon to be sent home, and in doing so, I unknowingly signed myself up for much driving.  The book is nice in that outlines possible routes to take by car and what to look for at the various locations; however, places always have a tendency of looking closer together on a map.  In preparation for these drives, my parents also brought a Garmin navigation system.  The sentiment was good, but without the built in navigation system in the car, the Garmin may have caused us some trouble.  We used the Garmin for only the first couple days after which we start realizing that the routes it is providing us with are not very direct.  We feel that we are spending too much time in fields of grains or sunflowers making small, confusing turns on narrow roads.  And each time we would miss a turn, we would get the grumpy reminder that the Garmin had to recalculate.  However, once we started using the built in navigation, we put grumpy Garmin to rest.

    Bridge near Lucca

    For our first drive, we roughly follow Frommer’s Tour 3: Garfagnana and the Apuan Alps.  Although our main stops throughout the day include Bagni di Lucca and its famous nearby bridge, Castelnuovo di Garfagnana, and Pietrasanta, the roads between the stops are the biggest highlight.  Never being a stretch of flat terrain, we are constantly alternating between bridge, tunnel, bridge, tunnel.  It reminds me of the drives in Sicily.  The bridges and tunnels aren’t small either.  The only places where the tunnels turned to switchbacks is near the marble deposits, and here the famous white Carrera Marble surrounds us.  From the mountains to the sea, today, we had a chance to experience small town Italy and explore the countryside between our meals and gelato breaks.

    Marina di Pietrasanta

    Firenze

    Firenze

    With Lucio Dalla (listen here) playing through the car speakers, Mom, Dad, and I set off for Florence.  After the adrenaline rush of driving through the city and finding parking, we go straight to the Galleria degli Uffizi.   In one building, we are able to enjoy the works of Caravaggio, Rembrandt, Botticelli, Giotto, and all of the teenage mutant turtles (Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello, and Raphael).  There is so much to see that so many other great paintings and sculptures get lost in the mix.  There is a bit of excitement getting into the museum because we have come to Florence at the peak of tourist season, but it ends up being well worthwhile.

    Although only a short visit to a city that offers so much, we fill it with highlights.  We climb Giotto’s Campanile on the Piazza del Duomo and get an expansive view of the city from above.  We admire the Ponte Vecchio, Florence’s most famous bridge crossing the Arno at its narrowest point.  We have a big dinner at Gusta Pizza.  Dad finds an excellent souvenir, a copy of Leonardo’s perpetual clock.  And all of this despite a threatening drizzle all day.

    Florence, the birthplace of the Italian Renaissance, was one of the political, economic, and cultural centers of Europe between the 14th and 16th centuries.  The language of Florence is now accepted as what we know as Italian thanks to famous authors such as Dante.  Florentine money was responsible for the development of industry all over Europe, and Florentine locals financed governments and projects including the papacy not too far away.  It was home to the Medici’s, who had international influence and were one of the world’s most important families.  And this is just a start of what makes Florence so unique.

    Cinque Terre

    Vernazza at sunset

    Any day that ends with a sunset highlighting a colorful cliff-side town overlooking the sea is hard to beat. However, one way to improve said scenario is if that same day’s ending results from the sun sneaking beneath a layer of dark gray clouds to make the occasion seem supernatural. This sunset photo of Vernazza is only as seen by the lens of the camera despite its many high-dynamic range characteristics. That’s how the day ends, and that will probably remain one of the greatest memories of my Cinque Terre experience; however, the day is full of other highlights from beginning to end.

    Cinque Terre

    There is wind from the minute we arrive in Levanto, the town just north of the famous Cinque Terre. We (I) drive to Levanto and we immediately train down to the southern most town, Riomaggiore. We each grab a snack and a cafe dopio in Riomaggiore before taking the famous Via dell’Amore into the next town, Manarola. The Via dell’Amore is a beautiful path from one town to the next that maps along the sea. Although crowded with people, the path is almost perfect as the wind keeps the temperature very comfortable.

    A hike's view

    Manarola, like most of the five towns, is small and takes only a short time to explore its roads and passages. I run around the vineyards that occupy the top-most part of the hill before we all continue on to town number three, Corniglia. A lunch later, we take our longest hike of the day from Corniglia to Vernazza. The views along the trail make the climbs more than worthwhile. We end the day in Vernazza with our daily gelato, a delicious seafood dinner, and as I already mentioned, an unreal sunset. The blues of the sea, the pastels of the buildings, and the stark cliffs shooting up from the water all make this site unique.

    First Day in Lucca

    Our first day in Lucca is spent within the limits of the city walls. In addition to appreciating the beautiful churches and piazzas, we are also lucky to be there on the third Sunday of a summer month, the day that Lucca has a large antique market. This market, centered around Piazza San Guisto and Piazza Antelminelli, is full of elaborate wood furniture, old radios, paintings of all different subjects, antique jewelry, and of course a bunch of old stuff that I can could never imagine purchasing. We punctuate the day with two delicious meals, the most delicious at Ristorante Giglio.

    Lucca Market 1

    Lucca Market 2

    In the evening, we attend a performance of Hamlet in a city church. The idea of the event sounds romantic, entertaining, and cultured; but, the execution wasn’t exactly that. The actors and actresses have strong Italian accents, and they speak Shakespearean old English as their voices echo off the the many walls in a church with a temperature warm enough to require the programs to be converted into fans. We tried.

    Onwards to Lucca

    Our last morning in Oriveto is spent underground. Orvieto hides caves and tunnels in the volcanic rock on which the city is build. In these underground passages that were originally mainly accessible by private homes above, we find wells, stairs, quarries, cellars, pigeon farms, and more. After a tour of the underground and a quick haircut, we are ready to make the drive north to Lucca.

    For our lunch stop on the road, we pause our drive in Montevarchi, a very quiet town where everyone has seemed to disappear during lunch hours. Although the options are limited, with the help of TripAdvisor’s seven reviewed restaurants, we find Daniele e Riccardo, a hidden restaurant near the center of town. We grab a table and the waitress’ first question is if we speak English. Initially, I only realize that she has a strong accent, which I reasonably assume to be Italian. We answer yes, we do speak English, and that is when I realize her accent is not Italian, but instead Northern European. Our waitress, who is from Denmark, speaks much better English than Italian, and has found her way to this small town for two weeks because she won a contest back home. We enjoy several great appetizers along with a lot of bread, olive oil and vinegar before continuing on our way.

    mom, dad, and me in lucca

    It is at this juncture that the primary driving responsibilities shift from my Dad to me. He is still a bit jet-lagged and the aggressive Italian driving style isn’t ideal in his tired state of mind. The first time I have driven since driving down to Southern California from the Bay Area before leaving the States was last night when we drove back from Perugia. The car is an automatic and easy to drive, and I enjoy getting back behind the wheel. We get to Lucca in the mid-afternoon, find our apartment, and before doing anything else, we go to the tourist office to start planning our week. We come up with many activities, especially evening activities, we grab a couple maps so that Dad can maintain his map folding prowess, and we set off to bravely explore the town of Lucca. We grab some gelato followed by dinner followed by a formal ballroom dancing display in a public piazza before heading back to the apartment to crash.

    Known for its well-maintained city walls, Lucca started as an Etruscan city then a Roman colony in the second century BC. Beginning in the 12th century, the city was an independent republic for about five hundred years. A couple fun facts are that the famous Italian poet Dante spent some of his exile within the wall of this city, and composer Giacomo Puccini was born here.

    Puccini statue